Take Control of Your Life

This page is being updated – incomplete 6/10/2014

At To Be Alpha, we believe you don’t have to be alpha to become alpha. This means no matter who you are today, does not have to be who you are tomorrow.

Being an Alpha male is a combination of how you think, how you act, how you look, and what you have in your life.

Sure, for some men and women, being alpha is easy. They were raised in an environment that supported the alpha mentality or allowed them to be introduced to ideas of being alpha earlier in life. But no matter how old you are or where you are in life, it’s not too late to be alpha.

The Alpha Male Mentality

What do you think about when you think about an alpha male? If you ask a few people this question I’m sure you’ll get a bunch of different answers. Some may say an alpha male is a suave confident man. Others may say an alpha male is bad boy that gets girls. Or an alpha male is a leader. Then others may say an alpha male is a cocky rude douche bag. The spectrum of ideas of what is an alpha male vary. But one thing is true, alpha males believe in themselves.

You don’t have to be right. You don’t have to be the best. You don’t have to be the best looking. You don’t have to get all the girls. You don’t have to be a superstar athlete. You don’t have to be a model.

What you need is to believe. When you believe in your abilities and in yourself, you come off as confident and self assured. This is the alpha mentality.

By believing in yourself, you aren’t afraid of doing things or saying things. An alpha male doesn’t hesitate because he believes.

Helpful hint: You don’t have to change your mentality over night. But you need to start doing things that make you feel more confident about yourself. If you lack abilities, find ways to obtain them. This includes learning new skills, studying, learning, or doing things that you need to do to become who you want to be. Small steps are progress to becoming the alpha male you want to be.

Take Chances / Taking Risks

Alpha males don’t always play it safe. Alphas are willing to go outside their comfort zone and try something different. Typically, an alpha male knows “no risk, no reward.”

If you do what you have always done, you’ll get what you have always got.

If something is holding you back from doing something, you need to find a way to break through that mental barrier. It could be a pretty girl you want to ask out or talk to, or asking for a promotion or even quitting your job to do something different. Whatever it is, you gotta find the balls to be alpha!

Alpha males know that even if they don’t succeed they can live with the results. Unlike a beta male, alpha’s know that life will go on. Alpha males are willing to take a chance to obtain whatever it is they want. At the end of the day, an alpha knows that trying is better than living a life of regret.

Helpful hint: So you might not be ready to jump out of a plan or quit your job or anything too crazy. That’s ok! Sure going balls out is great but its not for everyone. Just do something small that takes you out of your comfort zone until you start to realize that almost anything you do will be worth doing.

Balls out, be alpha.

This could actually be a part of taking risks but we can elaborate some more. If you’re going to live a fulfilling life you have to do what you want to do. Do what your heart wants you to do and you’ll be a lot happier than doing things that you feel you have to do (but don’t want to).

Don’t live life at 50%. Go all out if you’re going to try to be alpha. Don’t give up. Try different things. Have fun.

Helpful Hint: If you’re going to be alpha, commit to being alpha and do it. Persevere and don’t give up! If needed, get a support group to help you get to where you want to be.

Be a Leader, Don’t Be A Follower

Alpha males are leaders. They lead by example. They lead by speaking up. They lead by doing things other people aren’t willing to do and saying things other people aren’t willing to say.

Leaders are not defined by titles or by where you’ve been. You can be a leader if you want to be one.

Make Choices for You

Alpha males aren’t selfish, but they aren’t in the business of pleasing everyone. Sometimes alpha males have to make difficult decisions that not everyone agrees with, this is why they are considered leaders. But more importantly, alpha males do what they want to do because they want to do it. Alphas don’t always consider the feelings or thoughts of other people because they don’t seek external validation.

Alpha males put themselves first. This doesn’t make you selfish if you do this. Chances are if you live the life you want to live and do the things you want to do, you’ll be happier and a better person.

If you are putting other people ahead of your needs you need to re-evaluate why you are doing this. Are you trying to make everyone like you? Do you care too much about what people thing about you? Does the external validation make you feel good about yourself? This sort of thinking could limit your ability to live your life and be a real man/woman.

Don’t get me wrong. I’m not saying that you should disregard everyone else’s feelings. What I am saying is you need to just realize that this is your life and although you may need to consider the feelings of others or how your choices can affect the life of others, only you can make yourself happy. Try to remember that.

Helpful hint: Happiness comes from within. Don’t seek external validation or happiness from another source than yourself. This will help you make choices that you want to make in life.

Don’t Get So Emotional

A lot of guys and girls get emotional when things don’t go right. Or worse, when things don’t go their way, they overreact and get irrational. This type of behavior is not alpha. Getting upset, taking things out on others, and being overly dramatic does no one any good.

Body Language Matters